You’re my everything. My one and only. You’re all I need. The one. Listen to most love songs, and you’ll hear some version of these sentiments. After all, that’s how our society tells us romantic feelings should be expressed. But what about if love doesn’t look like that for you? What if you prefer polyamorous love songs? Or something a little different in its romantic focus?
There are many reasons why someone may want to express their love to a partner that doesn’t include mononormative ideas. Perhaps you have multiple romantic partners or a life filled with loving connections that take various forms. Or maybe you are monogamous, but you don’t like the concept of the ‘soulmate’ and the unrealistic expectations it can sometimes place on a relationship. You could also have had certain relationships in different stages in your life, all of which you cherished, and don’t want to assert that your current relationship is superior.
No matter what love looks like in your life, you’re allowed to have a little romance without it coming packaged with the weight of ‘the one.’ So, if you’re looking for polyamorous love songs or a tune you can send to a partner that reflects the way you love, here are 14 tracks I have handpicked that feel safe to swoon over.
There were many songs that I could have included in this playlist that didn’t quite make the cut. The Book of Love by The Magnetic Fields is one of my faves but the mention of wedding rings at the end might not chime with this collection. And Joni Mitchell’s A Case of You is a brilliant celebration of a loved one, but as she notes in the opening line, that relationship is already over.
Instead, I’ve included upbeat songs that rejoice in current love without using language that may not reflect how you see your relationship(s). Like a true music nerd, I’ve also organised the playlist by BPM, so it should flow nicely in your ears. You can find it on Spotify below, or I’ve also added it to YouTube if you prefer that platform. I hope you enjoy these tunes and find something that resonates with your life.
📌 Check out my songs about polyamory playlist for tunes that describe the experience of loving multiple people.
Do you have a suggestion? Comment below and let me know, as I’ll update this playlist every February.
Really Love by D’Angelo
Could there be a more beautiful song to ease us into this playlist? Spanish guitars ease us into this slow, sensual number that affirms over and over again the cutely phrased “I’m in really love with you.” D’Angelo’s voice has so much vulnerability and tenderness that it’s easy to imagine that he’s singing it to you. Send this song to a partner, and they will definitely get the message.
Anything by Adrianne Lenker
I started working on this playlist on a train trip with a lover, and when I asked them if they had any suggestions, this was the first song that came up. So, it’s lovely to include this beautifully raw solo number from Big Thief’s lead vocalist. It’s both a delicate and agonising ode to how intensely focused you become when falling in love with someone.
Nakamarra by Hiatus Kaiyote
If you’re looking for a dose of feel-good neo-soul, this love song is precisely the track you’re looking for. The lead singer of the Grammy-nominated Australian quartet croons to Hannah, the object of their affection, about how much they adore them, no matter the distance between them. It’s one of those tunes that will get stuck in your brain, so be warned.
What Time Do You Call This? by Elbow
There’s something about how Elbow’s frontman Guy Garvey sings about love that makes me believe in the nourishing, rewarding possibility of it all. Not the shiny, bright, hormone-drenched NRE of new love. The deep, enduring commitment of love that lasts many decades and spans many versions of each other. You won’t find this song on any of Elbow’s albums, as they wrote it for the soundtrack to the 2015 Simon Pegg/Lake Bell romantic comedy Man Up.
Faith by Sault
While listening to this song on the radio one day, I came up with the idea (and the desire) for this playlist. The beauty of this Sault track is that it expresses that feeling of why we continue to invest in the people we love. No matter what happens throughout the years, we have faith in them and feel stronger with them by our side.
At My Most Beautiful by R.E.M
If you’re looking for a love song with the same vibe as The Beach Boys’ God Only Knows (with a more upbeat tone), give this track a listen. Michael Stipe details all the deliciously embarrassing things you do when you love someone (like sending them voice notes of you reading poetry or counting their eyelashes while they sleep).
The Very Thought of You by Billie Holiday
It’s strange to think this recording is nearly 90 years old. There is nothing like old love songs to make you realise that how we experience love hasn’t changed throughout the ages. Holiday was openly bisexual throughout her entire career, so it’s lovely that this playlist includes love songs by so many queer artists (including, among others, Michael Stipe above).
Harvest Moon by Jane Birkin
It makes me so happy that one of the most gorgeous love songs of all time makes no mention of their partner being their one and only. Instead, the beauty of the lyrics lies in the pared-back adoration that crosses the ages. Of course, nothing beats Neil Young’s original, but as he has (quite rightly) refused to let Spotify profit from his music, then in its place, I have included my favourite cover by the one and only Jane Birkin.
The Way You Look Tonight by Tony Bennett
Pretty much everyone aside from Aretha has covered this song. But few versions compare to the simple beauty of Imelda Staunton singing it (with Emma Thompson harmonising and Hugh Laurie on piano) in the 1992 comedy Peter’s Friends. However, the rendition on this playlist is the classic by Tony Bennett, which features in a different film – the 1997 love triangle comedy My Best Friend’s Wedding.
Sunset by Caroline Polachek
I could tell you why this was the most romantic song of 2023, but the American singer-songwriter sums it up perfectly. “I wanted an operatic chorus with no lyrics but salted with some very real disillusionment: past all the distraction, dead ends, and false promises of the world is the love we too often take for granted. That’s my sunset.”
You Make Me Feel So Young by Frank Sinatra
This classic number is probably my favourite love song that isn’t about “the one”. It’s the perfect tune to send to a partner with whom you have a lot of fun, no matter how long you have been together. There’s such joy and delight in Frank Sinatra’s voice as he croons about the spirited energy the object of his affection brings to me. I adore how this sentiment could apply to any adult relationship at any age.
Can’t Believe The Way We Flow by James Blake
Is there a modern love song that embodies the pre-pandemic era more than this dreamy 2019 tune? The lyrics to this track by English singer-songwriter James Blake capture the delight of finding a unique bond with someone and deepening that connection and understanding over time. It’s one of those songs that wraps you up in its embrace when you’re feeling good in love.
It Must Be Love by Labi Siffre
Time to include one of the polyamorous love songs that have flown under the radar. You may be familiar with this track from Madness’ famous 1981 cover, but it was originally written and released by Labi Siffre, an English singer-songwriter. Not only was he openly and proudly queer when he released this song in the early 70s, but he also went on to live together with both his husbands for 16 years. As Siffre says himself, “I’ve always taken love very seriously” and I think that shines through in the lyrics to this song.
That’s How Strong My Love Is by Otis Redding
Wrapping up this playlist is a love song that’s so warm and wise that it’s hard to believe that Otis Redding was only 24 when he sang it. Described as “the Crown Prince of Soul” by Rolling Stone, you’d think by the depth and sincerity in his voice that Otis had decades of life and love under his belt.
Do you have a suggestion? Comment below and let me know, as I’ll update this playlist every February.
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